First of all, by “Southern”, I mean those who are either from the Southern states of the USA, or they have relatives there. I found this quote to explain…
“More than any other part of America, the South stands apart. Thousands of Northerners and foreigners have migrated to it … but Southerners they will not become. For this is still a place where you must have either been born or have ‘people’ there, to feel it is your native ground. “Natives will tell you this. They are proud to be Americans, but they are also proud to be Virginians, South Carolinians, Tennesseeans, Mississippians and Texans. But they are conscious of another loyalty too, one that transcends the usual ties of national patriotism and state pride. It is a loyalty to a place where habits are strong and memories are long. If those memories could speak, they would tell stories of a region powerfully shaped by its history and determined to pass it on to future generations.”— Tim Jacobson, Heritage of the South
The difference is only in the temperature and the presentation. In both the Arab world and the South, the use is the same.
Southern families serve sweet tea with just about every meal. It’s the house wine of the Southern states, and no meal would ever be complete without it. It’s not just for mealtime either, it’s for sitting around with the family or with friends, when people are just “shooting the breeze” as we say.
Arabs serve tea with every meal as well, and it’s also something to drink while socializing. People drink many cups of it every day, as the Southerners are drinking iced tea by the gallons.
English and American cookbooks report that tea has been served cold at least since the early nineteenth century, when cold green tea punches, heavily spiked with liquor, were popular. These punches went by names such as Regent’s Punch, named after George IV, the English prince regent between 1811 until 1820, and king from 1820 to 1830.
Iced tea’s popularity comes along at about the same time as refrigeration. The “icebox” as it was known was in place by the middle of the 19th century, and the term refrigerator was used for the first patented ice box in 1803. After that, the term “refrigerator” was common.
In the Middle East, coffee was the drink of choice until Indian traders began to sell tea in the Middle Eastern region, which was also in the late 1700’s. Since then, tea has been largely known for it’s heart healthy benefits and it’s pleasant taste as something you can drink loads of, as Arabic conversations tend to last for hours sometimes. (Just like Southerners)
So, whether it’s cold or hot, the two cultures are both tea cultures, and it’s become a large part of how we sit together and spend time as a family.
If you want to read a great book that centers around the idea of the two cultures being connected, have a look at DESERT MAGNOLIA by Dedra L. Stevenson on http://www.bluejinnimedia.com and sign up for our mailing list while you’re online for special offers, new products and contests. https://bluejinnimedia.com/community-signup/
The Southern granny has long been known in the media as being a sweet little “Paula Dean” type of character, humming a little tune to herself as she cooks fried chicken with a side of deep fried pickle slices whilst sporting a little apron with images of chickens or a funny little slogan on the front. When you walk into her kitchen, you can smell the cornbread being baked and with a big welcoming smile, she’ll offer you a big glass of sweet iced tea before you’ve had a chance to sit down.
Once you’ve finished eating, she won’t let you get up without a slice of one of her pies that she has undoubtedly prepared ahead of time for your arrival. Overall, you’ll feel very well taken care of, and she won’t let you wash a dish or do a thing. She’ll take care of all of it for you.
I had a granny like that back in Alabama, and my dear God, how I miss her everyday. In fact, Christmas time is a very sad time for me because not only was her birthday Xmas, she died around this time of the year as well, so it always leaves me with a hole in my heart where someone used to be. If you’ve ever had the pleasure of meeting one or being cared for by one, consider yourself very very lucky indeed.
As unique as my grandmother was, I did have the pleasure of being cared for by another, although, as I was her daughter in law, she expected me to help.
The Arabic granny greets her grandchildren in much the same way as a Southern grandma would. She also has a big meal prepared, but the chicken will be part of a dish known as Byriani, so it’s cooked in a pot with rice, onions and fried carrots. Just like the Southern granny, the Arabic granny has a lot of sweet treats and home made bread for her family as well. She even hums, but it’s not a bouncy little tune like the Southern granny, but a more somber tune.
Everything for the Arabic granny is a bit on the dramatic side, although you should NEVER say this to her out loud, as it may get you a serious reprimand by the entire family, much in the same way a Southern family would react if their granny was questioned in any way.
Disrespecting her or refusing her food is not allowed by anyone who considers himself or herself to be a lady or a gentleman, and if you dare to cross the line, the men of the family will undoubtedly rise up to defend her, as she is sacred to them.
For a great story with a LOT more to tell you about the high position of the family matriarch in both cultures, why not pick up a copy of Desert Magnolia on http://www.bluejinnimedia.com today?
Writing Desert Magnolia brought up a lot of interesting ideas that had been spinning in my head for a long time. We have so many family stories that only serve to demonstrate how alike we really are.
It’s incredibly strange that each and every time I mention this to a person from either culture, they look at me like I’m nuts! I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again though. The deep South has a LOT in common with an Arab family. There’s a reason that I feel so at home here. 🙂
First of all, hospitality is critical here. Hospitality and generosity. When someone comes to see you, you MUST take care of them in every way. They must have comfortable accommodations, someone to guide them around, and a generous supply of the best cuisine you can offer. It’s your duty as a lady or a gentleman. A stingy or selfish person is shunned and avoided. Now, I ask you…am I referring to an Arab family or a Southern family? Impossible to tell? I rest my case. 🙂
Let’s try another one, shall we? The family is everything, and if someone from your own family is threatened in any way, as a lady or a gentleman, you must defend their honor. Ok, am I referring to a Southern family or an Arab family?
I love many things about the families here, and again, they remind me so much of how families in my home state operate. People are just plain kind to each other, and they have the best manners ever in most cases. Respect for one’s elders is the most remarkable of these characteristics. Both Southern folks and Arabs feel that it’s almost unforgivably rude to curse or even raise your voice at your parents, your Aunts/Uncles, etc.
However, there’s always a down side, but interestingly enough, the downside is also similar in both cultures….Gossip, yes that’s what I’m referring to. Gossip and comparing oneself to the “Jones” home next door. If your neighbor has a Mercedes, often times, many families feel completely empty until they get one as well. Of course, I’m certainly not referring to everyone. Generally speaking, fake folks like that are not considered part of the “real” culture, but they do exist. The general consensus is that if you’re fake and shallow, you’re not liked very much.
So, if they have so much in common, why all the tension? On my next blog post, I will share some of the funniest tales of the dinner table from both regions for you. In the meantime, why not try Desert Magnolia, my crime drama, on http://www.bluejinnimedia.com? It’s available as both an Ebook and a Paperback.